What the Hell Did I Just Read



It S The Story They Don T Want You To Listen To Though, To Be Fair, They Are Probably Right About This One To Quote The Bible, Learning The Truth Can Be Like Loosening A Necktie, Only To Realize It Was The Only Thing Keeping Your Head Attached No, Don T Put The Book Back On The Shelf It Is Now Your Duty To Purchase It To Prevent Others From Listening To It Yes, It Works With Audiobooks, Too, I Don T Have Time To Explain HowWhile Investigating A Fairly Straightforward Case Of A Shape Shifting Interdimensional Child Predator, Dave, John, And Amy Realized There Might Actually Be Something Weird Going On Together, They Navigate A Diabolically Convoluted Maze Of Illusions, Lies, And Their Own Incompetence In An Attempt To Uncover A Terrible Truth They Like You Would Be Better Off Not KnowingYour First Impulse Will Be To Think That A Story This Gruesome And, To Be Frank, Stupid Cannot Possibly Be True That Is Precisely The Reaction They Are Hoping ForWhat the Hell Did I Just Read

Is a well-known author, some of his books are a fascination for readers like in the What the Hell Did I Just Read book, this is one of the most wanted David Wong author readers around the world.

➾ What the Hell Did I Just Read  Download ➹ Author David  Wong – Mauritiusholidayvillas.co.uk
  • Audio CD
  • What the Hell Did I Just Read
  • David Wong
  • 12 June 2018
  • 1978605064

10 thoughts on “What the Hell Did I Just Read

  1. says:

    I always go ga ga over these books, and for a really great reason They re FUN AS HELL.It bends all genres, has some of the absolutely most delicious wry comments and commentary on our modern f ed up life, and is consistently over the top when it comes to action, monster mashing, and total reality crushing.Did I mention that this is to UF as Evil Dead is to Horror It s not a bad comparison But then, it s sure as hell not complete, either, because this stuff is in it s own league.Think slacke I always go ga ga over these books, and for a really great reason They re FUN AS HELL.It bends all genres, has some of the absolutely most delicious wry comments and commentary on our modern f ed up life, and is consistently over the top when it comes to action, monster mashing, and total reality crushing.Did I mention that this is to UF as Evil Dead is to Horror It s not a bad comparison But then, it s sure as hell not complete, either, because this stuff is in it s own league.Think slacker slasher fic that does the funniest Supernatural episodes but adds a bit of crack to it to make it evenaddictive, then throw in a major course of Cthulhu, sexual innuendo, and Cracked Magazine, and then you re getting pretty close.It s the same for all three of these books, and I m proud to say that this third one is still very strong, indeed No spoilers, but as it says in the series, John Dies at the End For those of you who don t know the books, he really does die, but it doesn t always stick thanks to the Soy Sauce The time travel and alternate dimension hopping and a barrel of snakes that is potential girlfriends just makes things a bit complicated You know, normal stuff.All in a day s unpaid work.Of course, that s not to say everyone has supernatural girlfriends, and Dave s Amy is a real trooper and a badass whom I really love Honestly, this is some of the most righteous laugh out loud OTT technocolor raunchy cool books out there It s a self conscious B Movie that transcends into ultimate badassery I am STILL totally recommending this series

  2. says:

    Find all of my reviews atYou want to hear a story Well, buckle the fuck upYou re probably wondering how someone who incessantly and annoyingly occasionally mentions how she doesn t read past the first book in a series ended up reading a 3 Well, the answer is simple But in this case I want free books Here s the part where I publicly out myself and admit that I have had a hard copy of What The Hell Did I Just Read in ARC format for EIGHT MONTH Find all of my reviews atYou want to hear a story Well, buckle the fuck upYou re probably wondering how someone who incessantly and annoyingly occasionally mentions how she doesn t read past the first book in a series ended up reading a 3 Well, the answer is simple But in this case I want free books Here s the part where I publicly out myself and admit that I have had a hard copy of What The Hell Did I Just Read in ARC format for EIGHT MONTHS This is why NetGalley denies me so frequently they are well aware of how much suck I bring to the table Look at this Even Django Unchained can t hide his judgey face while witnessing me read volume after volume while WTHDIJR remained untouched on the pile of shame Now that I have finally read this, what do I have to say Much like the many pornographies I read, the term series can be applied pretty loosely here I don t necessarily think readers would feel out of the loop if they jumped in on 3 and I am living proof that you don t have to read 2 in order to have a good time with it The backstory of David, John and Amy is briefly summed up in snippets where applicable throughout story in order to catch everyone up to speed Other than that In the immortal words of Jackie Gleason This time around the crew is assisting with a missing child caseLet me give you a tip if you re ever the victim of a terrible crime like, say, your kid goes missing and you see the cops consulting with a couple of white trash looking dipshits in their late twenties, it s time to worry It s not because John and I are incompetent at what we do and I assure you, we are but because you need to start asking yourself a very hard question Not Will I get my child back but Do I want to get my child backFrom there it s another long strange trip filled with secret government agencies and alternate universes and fuckroaches andthe biggest titties I ve ever seen on an Asian girland vigilante ex military members and weapons of choice like a t shirt gun that shoots the Shroud of Turin and an iPod shuffle loaded with 80s power ballads And when all else fails Put a little Soy Sauce on itIn layman s terms this book is sorta what would happen if thisDo y all watch Ghosted I m not a real avid T.V watcher, but this one has been pretty entertaining And this Had a baby I get asked a lot by co workers if there s a genre that I don t really care for and I am always quick to say Science Fiction I think I ve finally come to terms with the fact that Because this was straight up Sci Fi and I absolutely loved it Endless thanks to St Martin s Press for sending me a copy in exchange for my honest review.

  3. says:

    The best John Dies at the End book yet All the old gang is back and their lives are stranger and creepier than ever before Just like the other two books in the series, John Dies at the End and This Book Is Full of Spiders Seriously, Dude, Don t Touch It it is a mix of horror, suspense, mystery and weird fiction Even though there are moments of sheer slap stick comedy and ridiculousness the main plot remains interesting and horrific This book had aurgent feel and the central mystery The best John Dies at the End book yet All the old gang is back and their lives are stranger and creepier than ever before Just like the other two books in the series, John Dies at the End and This Book Is Full of Spiders Seriously, Dude, Don t Touch It it is a mix of horror, suspense, mystery and weird fiction Even though there are moments of sheer slap stick comedy and ridiculousness the main plot remains interesting and horrific This book had aurgent feel and the central mystery of the story wascompelling and relatable than the previous two books It is also written in a way that if you are new to the series you could pick this one up and it could easily be read as a stand alone Now granted, the reader has to suspend belief, you have to almost throw it out the window but that is the fun of this book If you like your horror blended with extra creepiness and comedy this book is for you

  4. says:

    David is an unemployed collector of cursed objects The savvy Amy is his sweet girlfriend who supports the household And then there s John, the apocalyptic friend These are the characters and the story, unreliably Mach 8.David and John do not know their way around a nine to five job But they do know how to battle monsters and ghoulish evil Amy is the grounded one on the team They are the ones the cops calls when children go missing And one does Can these two find the Maggie while fightin David is an unemployed collector of cursed objects The savvy Amy is his sweet girlfriend who supports the household And then there s John, the apocalyptic friend These are the characters and the story, unreliably Mach 8.David and John do not know their way around a nine to five job But they do know how to battle monsters and ghoulish evil Amy is the grounded one on the team They are the ones the cops calls when children go missing And one does Can these two find the Maggie while fighting the darkness, armed with only an air cannon and a speaker wailing monster ballads And without effing the whole thing up Having read this series backward might have been David s favorite thing about this review I realized I might have lost some nuances of the characters and situations But this read was a laugh out loud, and slapstick heroes conquer monsters book The main protagonists are over the top ridiculous, yet they still retain a down to earth quality They show soul and vulnerability about where they are in their lives David s ponderings made him an everyday guy trying to get by in the world and do right by Amy And John, although fly by the seat of your pants kind of guy would like to have someone to share his life The characters are just trying to keep up in a chaotically fast life But enough of this, there is a little girl in the balance I read this original book slowly to savor all the interesting details The story at large was very intriguing and well plotted The narrative was humorous with punch drunk dialogue but at times made you empathize with the heroes The freaky shape shifters imitating the characters made it challenging to determine who was who Nothing is as they seem And actual David, John, and Amy were tri dimensional and kept me vested in the whirlwind narrative Love, love, love this crazy journey into Thank you, NetGalley, St Martin s Press and the author for this ARC in exchange for my honest review

  5. says:

    David Wong always knows how to deliver enjoyable, surprisingly deep, and universally unsettling sci fi horror books with his John Dies at the End series This installment had a very monster of the week feel to it as Dave and John and Amy find themselves pitted against a foe capable of distorting their memories and minds in unsettling ways Not a ton of references to the previous books and that is fine by me I think this series makessense as a series of standalone adventures that slowly bu David Wong always knows how to deliver enjoyable, surprisingly deep, and universally unsettling sci fi horror books with his John Dies at the End series This installment had a very monster of the week feel to it as Dave and John and Amy find themselves pitted against a foe capable of distorting their memories and minds in unsettling ways Not a ton of references to the previous books and that is fine by me I think this series makessense as a series of standalone adventures that slowly build and develop the main characters and their relationships When Wong wants to finish the series for good he will have a rich vein of backstory, world building, and character depth to draw upon to give the story of Amy, John, and Dave a satisfying conclusions where hopefully John will not die.We get POV chapters from all three with John s being the most entertaining by far and a nice further character development from them all It is interesting to see the world through each of their own perspectives and how those perspectives differed We get plenty of action, weird existential horror, and Dave and John s patented screw ups Oh, and lots of crude jokes, can t forget about the crude jokes.Overall an excellent sci fi horror book whose horror comes not in jump scares or bloody scenes, but existential ponderings and otherworldly horrors that subvert the very essence of what it means to be human While not as transcendent as John Dies at the End this was still a great, weird, entertaining read

  6. says:

    review coming soon.A young girl goes missing in Undisclosed since strange elements are suspected Dave and John are called into the case of course Amy, Dave s girlfriend ia soon entangled in the plot speaking of the plot if you thought once Maggie was returned to her parents it was case closed, you may not have read any Wong before it is once the girl is returned that the story gets stranger and stranger in magnificent David Wong fashion.This third title in the JDATE series is on my opinion t review coming soon.A young girl goes missing in Undisclosed since strange elements are suspected Dave and John are called into the case of course Amy, Dave s girlfriend ia soon entangled in the plot speaking of the plot if you thought once Maggie was returned to her parents it was case closed, you may not have read any Wong before it is once the girl is returned that the story gets stranger and stranger in magnificent David Wong fashion.This third title in the JDATE series is on my opinion the best pace with the plot never losing much momentum As I told my best friend Morgannah despite all the weird delicious action and wonderfully dark humour I could nitpick and detract half a star But the fact is i loved the whole so much and therefrore am refraining from being too nitpicky as this is a really fun tale and I dont have the heart to take anything away from that

  7. says:

    Believe it or not, the Sauce didn t bring this book to my doorstep Shocking Definitely I mean, how else could it have found me Perhaps Molly s ghost could have brought it by Or maybe Amy thought it might come in handy when REDACTED comes looking for me But no, believe it or not, it was the hooded figures at St Martin s Press that sent it my way, in exchange for a review I have yet to figure out their true motivation for sending this book to find me, but find me it did.I am going to ke Believe it or not, the Sauce didn t bring this book to my doorstep Shocking Definitely I mean, how else could it have found me Perhaps Molly s ghost could have brought it by Or maybe Amy thought it might come in handy when REDACTED comes looking for me But no, believe it or not, it was the hooded figures at St Martin s Press that sent it my way, in exchange for a review I have yet to figure out their true motivation for sending this book to find me, but find me it did.I am going to keep this review spoiler free as I d hate to be the reason you find out that Dave shoots REDACTED right before John took REDACTED and that UNDISCLOSED is really REDACTED Also I d hate to ruin the reason that Amy finds REDACTED traumatic.When I first got my hands on the book I was tempted to tear through, just gobble it down like a starving monster at an all night people buffet But I didn t I decided to take it slow and really savor every page, kind of like a monster who d found a REALLY tasty child to munch on I m so glad I did On the surface, What the Hell Did I Just Read reads like John and Dave s other adventures, but just like the previous two novels, if you read deeper into the story, you will find shocking layers of horror that you probably weren t expecting Where the first was heavy on the comedy with a healthy dose of horror and the second was heavy on the horror with some comedy, What the Hell is aequal balance of the two, which I really enjoyed Instead of long stretches without one or the other, they flowed together muchsmoothly this time around Not that I had a problem with the two previous books, but it made this installment feelgrown up and refined Speaking of beinggrown up, John still hasn t And bless him for it He is just as ridiculous and over the top as ever, whereas Dave really struggles in this one He s having a hard time coping with where he s at in life and it s this storyline that takes this book from being just a crazy monster ride into being something so muchHis struggles are, at times, painfully relatable One of my favorite things about these books is Wong s ability to infuse the supernatural horror with so much humanity That is what makes these reads such a treat for me The monster storyline in this book had me shocked, amused and horrified There was one point where I had to put the book down and walk away My mind was blown Still is at the thought of that particular moment It s with John racing away from the church, that all I ll say.I marked this book five stars, but I really think that 4 isaccurate My only issue with the book was that I wanted a littleresolution in the end from both the human and monster storylines I m not someone who needs everything wrapped up perfectly, but it was just a little too open for me I can only hope that this means we ll get a fourth adventure one that will address Dave s struggles .There are so many books I want to read, so many that are piled up in my bedroom waiting to be read I have this terrible feeling that I will never make it through everything I want to read But this one was my most anticipated book of 2017 from the moment I heard about it I had the whole release day planned out for October 7th, but getting to read it early was an incredible gift These books touch something deep within me and I connect to them on a soul deep level I don t know what that says about me, or my soul Perhaps that means it s filled with REDACTED , I don t know But I love these books dearly and thank you David Wong for giving them to us I can t wait to see what s next There better be a next, or I ll have to REDACTEDREDACTEDREDACTEDREDACTEDREDAC

  8. says:

    I finished a book in twelve hours I m cured depression is OVER The charming, nonsense title of this book belies a density that s striking even for this series, a grand tradition of goofy names, horrific imagery and stomach churning philosophical quandaries Trying to explain in too much detail would, I think, ruin some of the greatest moments of the earlier books, so I won t do that here, but I ll say this it never fails to be striking the way these books blend mundane problems and grotesq I finished a book in twelve hours I m cured depression is OVER The charming, nonsense title of this book belies a density that s striking even for this series, a grand tradition of goofy names, horrific imagery and stomach churning philosophical quandaries Trying to explain in too much detail would, I think, ruin some of the greatest moments of the earlier books, so I won t do that here, but I ll say this it never fails to be striking the way these books blend mundane problems and grotesque cosmic disasters essentially seamlessly For comedy, yes, but even for serious ramifications and crucial plot arcs David s untreated depression, Amy s relationship anxiety, are just as significant and gut wrenching as the shapeshifting larvae disguising themselves as children so they can consume their human parents You need to have a certain stomach for these books But seriously the description of Loretta Knoll is right up there with some of the most disgusting, upsetting things I ve ever read Nice The philosophy of the John and Dave books, as I guess we re calling them now, is that after we die we re endlessly consumed among millions of others in the stomach of a cosmic evil, so it s important to do right by yourself and the people you love while you still have the chance If nothing we do matters, all that matters is what we do

  9. says:

    Definitely the best book David Wong has written A very mature did I really just say that and polished entry in the JDatE saga that still retains the sophomoric humor and zaniness of its predecessors I have no idea how this book was not monumentally confusing but he writes and explains things in such a way that I never felt lost and I always knew who was who There were laugh out loud moments but also scenes that poke your heart and make you feel your feelings, did I mention how mature this Definitely the best book David Wong has written A very mature did I really just say that and polished entry in the JDatE saga that still retains the sophomoric humor and zaniness of its predecessors I have no idea how this book was not monumentally confusing but he writes and explains things in such a way that I never felt lost and I always knew who was who There were laugh out loud moments but also scenes that poke your heart and make you feel your feelings, did I mention how mature this one is All three in the series are pretty much standalone and can be read independently but to get the full effect of who everyone is and what they mean to each other, start from book one Top notch, quality entertainment, I highly recommend

  10. says:

    I ve been waiting on this book for years, so I admit I m a tad disappointed There were a few things that really annoyed me when I was reading, so even though this was ridiculous and funny, it wasn t nearly as good as it could have been.First, I don t need the political arguments I m reading a book about illusion making maggots, I don t really care about the author s view on the healthcare system Anyway, it wasn t as if the political views were subtle, they were utterly glaring and sort of too I ve been waiting on this book for years, so I admit I m a tad disappointed There were a few things that really annoyed me when I was reading, so even though this was ridiculous and funny, it wasn t nearly as good as it could have been.First, I don t need the political arguments I m reading a book about illusion making maggots, I don t really care about the author s view on the healthcare system Anyway, it wasn t as if the political views were subtle, they were utterly glaring and sort of took me out of the story.Second Oh my freaking god, just kill off Amy already She is the literal worst view spoiler Oh, I know it s an evil larvae, but it looks like a kid so you can t kill it hide spoiler Almost everything she said was utterly annoying and painful to read I thought she was bad in the last book, she s gotten to levels of annoying that I wasn t sure could exist in a fictional character Last, view spoiler The whole David needs to go to therapy intervention hide spoiler also irritated the balls off of me I could see it coming, but it was still stupid and pointless and not at all funny Overall, this was readable and ridiculous, which are two things I do like about it As always, without John this probably wouldn t have been a very good book, but his random insanity is at least very refreshing I really just wish that David Wong would stop getting so emo and serious and causing such a mood dissonance in the last two books

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